Loving Your Enemies... Really.

Vanessa
Feb 17, 2017
4 min read

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbour and hate your enemy’. But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you”– Matthew 5:43-44 (ESV)

Loving your neighbour is one thing, but loving your enemy? Sure, it’s something we know we’re supposed to do, but how many of us actually live this out in our day-to-day lives? How many Christians out there actually make a point to ‘love’ those who hurt them? How can you love someone who hurts you? Who actively seeks to bring you harm? Who is hurting your friends and family? Who you disagree with on a philosophical level? Who terrorizes the world? How are we supposed to love these unlovables?

And yet, that is exactly what Jesus asks us to do. And not only did he ask us to do it, but he lived it. Jesus was continually persecuted while on Earth, and he could have easily hated those who sought to bring him harm, but he didn’t. He held no grudges, nor did he allow his disciples to hold grudges. He was kind to his enemies and to those the world had cast off. He was forgiving, and he bore injury without malice. He was the living example of ‘practice what you preach’.

And I think we sometimes look to Jesus’ example and think we can’t ever measure up. We think we’re not strong enough, not patient enough, not loving enough. But this loving, forgiving attitude towards one’s enemies can be done. It has been done. Think Nelson Mandela. Or Corrie Ten Boom. Or Anotine Leiris, French national and author of ‘You Will Not Have My Hate’. I want to share a short excerpt from the book…

One night last winter [winter of 2015], Antoine Leiris was at home looking after his son while his wife, Hélène, was at a concert with friends. Suddenly he started receiving text messages from friends asking if he was ok. Turning on the TV, Antoine watched the terrorist attacks in Paris unfolding around him and tried to call Hélène. She didn’t answer. That night Hélène was killed, along with 88 other people, at the Bataclan Theatre. Three days later, Antoine wrote an open letter to his wife’s killers on Facebook. He refused to be cowed or to let his 17-month-old son’s life be defined by their acts[…] Instantly, that short post caught fire and was shared thousands of times around the world.

This is what he said:

“On Friday night, you stole the life of an exceptional being, the love of my life, the mother of my son, but you will not have my hate. I don’t know who you are and I don’t want to know. You are dead souls. If that God for whom you blindly kill made us in his image, each bullet in my wife’s body will have been a wound in his heart. So, no, I will not give you the satisfaction of hating you. That is what you want, but to respond to your hate with anger would be to yield to the same ignorance that made you what you are. You want me to be scared, to see my fellow citizens through suspicious eyes, to sacrifice my freedom for security. You have failed. I will not change. I saw her this morning. At last, after days and nights of waiting. She was as beautiful as she was when she went out on Friday evening, as beautiful as when I fell madly in love with her more than twelve years ago. Of course, I am devastated by grief, I grant you that small victory, but it will be short-lived. I know she will be with us every day and that we will see each other in the paradise of free sould to which you will never have access. There are only two of us – my son and myself – but we are stronger than all the armies of the world. Anyway, I don’t have any more time to waste on you, as I must go see Melvil, who is just waking up from his nap. He is only seventeen months old. He will eat his snack as he does every day, then we will play as we do every day, and all his life this little boy will defy you by being happy and free. Because you will not have his hate either.”

The funny thing is, much of the reason why this post received the attention that it did is because Antoine's reaction seemed so abnormal. How could he possibly not hate the people who had caused him so much pain and heartache? And yet, he didn't. Rather than giving in to the toxicity of hate, he chose to rise above, to take the higher road, and to be free.

So I ask you now to pause and consider your ‘enemies’. Consider Antoine’s reaction to his enemies. Consider Jesus’ reaction to His enemies. Look at His response, and ask Him for the strength to open your heart in the same way. It’s not easy, but the freedom and peace that it brings is well worth the effort.

- V